April 19th, 2008
003- Task in the Temple
Sorry the comic was late! A lot or work went into this one. I already spot some things on this change I’ll be changing on future pages.
First off, you should notice Marken’s "pupils" on his goggles now. That’ll likely need a little fine-tuning. Next, dialogue balloons are hand-drawn now. They look a little rougher, but I think that’s just fine.
So… what’s up with the egg huh?
April 19th, 2008 at 12:04 am
Epic Lighting inside the temple, love the setting and details, very well done, and Phonnt want’s Marken’s hoody
April 19th, 2008 at 10:02 am
[...] APRIL 19: The crew has entered the Mantoid temple and now know they’re going to be shipping… an egg? [...]
April 19th, 2008 at 10:12 am
Hmm well I don’t want to be picky for the sake of being picky but the only thing I noticed was the reddish line going down vertically directly under the speech bubble “We appreciate….” and that I see the leaves of the trees aren’t as transparent as to what they were in the last two pages. I can see by the reddish line however that its the outline to another building, but I think it just stuck out to me as it’s outline is way too straight, and not as eroded to fit what I presume is an ancient building. Sorry I’m gabbling. Anyways this was something I just noticed. The things I noticed with the trees are irrelevant considering I’m enjoying the characterizations and pacing here.
Okay…maybe I am being picky for the sake of being picky….:p
April 19th, 2008 at 10:26 am
I don’t see any redish line, so I am not sure how to address it. There is a line for the outline between the right hand wall and the temple itself though. Maybe that’s it? The line is supposed to be there though. Oh wait, you caught it, alright.
As for the trees, people didn’t really like the transparentness of them, so I drew leaf-bundles this time.
The agenda for the next page, aside from getting it done, is to polish my hand-drawn bubbles a bit, do panel borders that aren’t quite as uniform, and probably fix the coloring-style a bit.
As for the nitpicks, don’t worry, feel free to keep them coming.
April 19th, 2008 at 11:20 am
Well after your journal you made on DA, the last thing I want to do is make you constantly double check your work all the time. It can be a soul destroyer to some people. So of course, I’m happy you take it all as it comes, as you should do.
As for the reddish line, that’s the only thing I noticed that caught me off as it was so solid. At least it establishes the edge of another building but it also prooves the differences in artistic technique. Plus I was putting on my critique’s eye.
Truth be told, you take them in pinches. I mean, I didn’t realise not a lot of people didn’t like your fireleaves transparent. I did. But at the end of the day, what do you see?
April 19th, 2008 at 11:22 am
Nice use of camera angles, HP. Mucho props.
April 19th, 2008 at 12:03 pm
Shaz: I did feel that the leaves looked a little odd, but I didn’t think changing them would be a good move because I wanted to remain consistant. Condiering all the other changes I’ve made now though, I tried make the leaves look better to me. I do like the transparent effect a bit, so on future pages I’ll try doing the solid spots with transparent elements as well. I can use plenty of layers, this is photoshop after all.
Pembroke: Thanks!
April 19th, 2008 at 3:06 pm
That’s cool hon.
Keep fighting!
April 20th, 2008 at 1:23 am
“You must carry the egg through the forest on a spoon. Held in your mouth. And the only safe way through the forest is on this elaborate network of tightropes we’ve constructed thirty feet above the forest floor. Good luck!”
Great work, HPK. I dig the new speech bubbles. They fit the words a tad better, and they add that extra hand-drawn personality to the comic. SUPER YEAH.
April 21st, 2008 at 2:30 am
Love it. The word bubbles are looking really good with the finished product <33
Also, I really like the addition of Marken’s pupils, especially in the seventh panel. I think that’ll allow you to do more with his expressions. SO AH UHPPROOVS
April 21st, 2008 at 8:06 am
Eeeeee!!! It looks fantastic
April 21st, 2008 at 8:12 am
I know where this is going! First they’ll name their egg then draw a face on it with Sharpie marker. Then Dash will look after it in homeroom and accidentally forget it under the desk. It will be cracked by lunchtime, and they’ll all have to write essays on being responsible parents.